Abby's First Bottle

Abby had her first bottle tonight. I'm sad. I know I should be happy that she took to the bottle so successfully, but I just feel sad that for the first time she didn't need me. I know that's not entirely true as she was drinking my pumped breastmilk but for her very first feed every she wasn't nursing from me directly. It's like a little hint of independence that I'm just not ready for.

Tonight was Girl's Night and I was really looking forward to it as it's been a while since I've seen some of these girls, but having Girl's Night means a logistics scramble now as I try to figure out what to do with Abby. Nate and I decided that this time Abby would stay home and Nate would take care of her while I would be a single gal for dinner. Up until now I'd always taken Abby along with me and either left when she got fussy or she was a quiet baby and let me hang out without interruption. So I pumped all day today to have milk for Nate should we run past her normal nursing for dinner time. Then after two good-bye kisses I headed out. (Side note: I took the Acura which I haven't driven since a bit before Abby was born. It was awesome! I felt like I was sitting on the ground again, turned the music up to ear blasting level, rolled the windows down and opened the sunroof, and raced to Bonefish Grill instead of the steady Mommy pace I've been driving recently. Ahh, how I miss my car. The SUV is nice but it's not my sports car.)

I had a fabulous time at dinner, but was definitely looking forward to seeing Abby when I got home. (No worries about Nate as I knew he would do a fabulous job.) At home I found Abby fed and already asleep. Turns out I had underestimated her feeding needs as I'd left 2 oz of breastmilk but it appears that she feeds more than that at a time now as she finished her bottle and was still hungry for me. It took a bit to settle her as she was still a bit hungry but Nate did get her down.

So here I sit. My baby nursed from a bottle with her Dad instead of from me, she got put down in her crib and stayed there for over an hour, and she's now in her bassinet sleeping soundly. Man, it sort of feels like I wasn't needed at all. I know that's just the emotions talking but this is a 'first' that is a little sad for me. Definitely looking forward to the next 'fun' first.